So many things are going on in our crazy life right now and I love it all.
First: My brother Mac returned home from his mission to Oakland, California! Two years went by both slowly and very quickly for us while he was gone. He is the same but different in some ways as well. Z warmed up to him immediately (surprise, surprise). It has been great to have him home for a little over a week now. We really look forward to spending some time in the temple with him in a few weeks when we have Zad sealed to us.
#2: Z turned 6 months! He just gets bigger and happier the older he gets. Sometimes he just breaks out into big belly laughs at the littlest things. He grunts so I grunt back, he squeals and I squeal back, then he just cracks up; I just love it! Every morning when he wakes up I hear him talking to himself and I head in to get him. He hears the door open and just goes crazy kicking and squealing with a big grin waiting for me to pick him up. It's as if seeing me in the morning all disheveled and sleepy is the greatest part of his day (at least that's what I think). It is actually slowly converting me into a morning person.
He is in the 75% for weight (at almost 20lbs.), 85% for height (Steve loves this), and 95% for his head (he is a smart boy, you know). He rolls over and scoots around the floor, grabs his feet and chews on his toes, babbles, and eats lots of cereal and veggies.
#3: Norma, Steve, and I seem to be on the speaking circuit for adoption and all of its aspects lately. We spoke at a regional adoption conference on Saturday. It was a conference for adoptive couples who are currently in the process of adoption. Norma did a wonderful job. She first spoke with her mom and sister Monica on experiences a birth family goes through when placing a child for adoption. I find myself just marveling at how amazing this family is over and over again. They truly leave me in awe as I listen to their story of finding adoption as an answer to all of their prayers, and then Norma's unselfish choice that I know broke her heart. What I find even more incredible is how the Lord continues to heal her heart. Each time I see her she seems to be more content and happy with her decision to place her son with us. This is so comforting to me as I have spent so many nights praying that her life will always be as happy and as fulfilling as He can help it to be. She is a hero to me.
My dad also spoke on Saturday as an adoptee. His experience is quite different from most adoptions, especially compared to those of today. I always enjoy hearing him speak and it was so nice of him to fly down and share his story with so many people.
My dear friend from nursing school, Jody came to speak as well. She is a stellar pediatric nurse who came to teach on new born care. It's rare that adoptive couples are present during the whole hospital shpeal on caring for a newborn so her information was very needed and appreciated.
Finally Norma and another birth mom, Cami spoke on open adoption, a topic that makes many adoptive couples nervous, as it did us at one time. It's surprising to look back and realize how much our views of open adoption have changed, a 180 from where we started. To me, this is the area of adoption that not only requires a great amount of faith but also holds with it some of the sweetest blessings. Most people think of it from the side of the birth mom and the benefits it holds for her: seeing that her baby is happy and healthy, reaffirming that she made a good choice, etc. But from our side of things it brings so much peach to see that she is happy, doing well, progressing with her life, happy with her decision of us as his family. From where I sit now, I see very few negative aspects of having an open adoption. However, I feel that such a good relationship with Norma has been born of both sides moving forward with caution and consideration for one another but mostly just a love for each other and faith that Heavenly Father cares for all of us equally and desires us all to be happy.
The conference was wonderful and I think we were all pretty exhausted afterward. With so much emotion involved with telling our stories and hearing those of other birth moms and the families they have chosen; it felt like an emotional marathon that lasted all day. Steve, Z and I crashed hard that night in Flagstaff.
Yes that's right, after the conference we headed to Flag to hear Mac give his homecoming talk in church. My dad was gracious enough to fly us up and then back Sunday evening. It really saved us a lot of time and energy we did not have. An hour in a plane sure beats two and a half hours by car, plus we skip all the traffic; its wonderful. Every time we fly with my dad I think, Steve really needs to finish pursuing his license. Besides Z loves to fly as well, happy as a little toad!
#4 We are getting ready to celebrate our 14th, yes FOURTEENTH wedding anniversary! I can't tell you how old this makes me feel but 14 years with Steve and I don't regret one of them yet!! He really is amazing. I have a doctor that I have seen many, many times over the years since we have been married, Dr. Shahon. He is a wonderful urologist, who has seen me in both some great and really bad times. Even now when I see him he asks how Steve is doing and I say, "He's the best!" To which Shahon responds, "You always say that." But what else can I say, Steve really is the best. I don't expect every one to think that, especially if they think their husband is the best, but really Steve is the best and since you are not lucky enough to be married to him, you will just have to take my word for it.
These past few months in having Z has revealed a whole new side of Steve. For any who know him, you will know that he does not typically do very well with change. Especially change that comes quickly. In fact, he really trys to avoid sudden changes. So being chosen to be parents and then becoming those parents in a little over 48 hours might be considered by some to be a "quick change." I however, revel in quick change, almost like being on a roller coaster. "What a great ride," I think and then afterwards look back on the coaster and think, "What was I thinking, that looks terrifying, I just did that?"
To my great surprise, Steve has reveled this time. Not only during the weekend that we met Norma and then welcomed Z into our lives but has continued to shine over the past 6 months. I end many days thinking or saying, "I thought I would be better at this whole mother thing." Then I think, "Why aren't you struggling more with all of this change? You are the one that usually freaks out and I get to be the calm, comforting one." Anyway, to say the least, he has been the calm one and it has been wonderful. I love watching him play with Z, or feed him, or rock him to sleep, or bath him, or carry him around talking to him about everything in site.
#5 We are preparing to host not two but three families (Steve's, Norma's, and mine) over Labor Day weekend for Z's blessing and sealing. We are so excited to have some many people in town. Most of Steve's family has never met Z or Norma and her family. Several people that we don't get to see very often are coming. We realized I while back that Z loves a crowd, the more action and people to watch the better. He just loves all the excitement and seems to enjoy a lot of attention. We think he takes after me in this way. People, people, people, we love people. Watching him grow and develop is starting to reveal just how much he is like us. He is very curious like Steve. He studies new things constantly, new sounds, lights, objects, and he watches us do everything. It's so fun to watch him and show him new things. Just today I was playing on the floor with him showing him the handles on our armoire and how they worked while he watched in fascination at the sound they make.
